Day 75

New Years Eve. This is a topic I have meaning to discuss and the question was posed to me by Mark P. These were his exact quotes: Everyone says "I hate new years, its so overrated" but do most people really mean it? Some girl I work with was just saying that, and then went on to say that she's going to some $125 party at a club?! I always say I'd love to stay home, but wouldn't that end up being depressing? Is bashing new years just a cool thing to say?

To me New Years Eve is amateur night. We started going out of town every new years when my in laws moved to Scottsdale and I never had to worry about making lame plans. We would always end up a crazy crowded bars or clubs, spending over $100 to drink shitty vodka and never being able to even get a drink on top of it. There are never any cabs to be had in Chicago new years eve. One year Sean and I walked back to my apartment in 5 degree temperatures for 40 minutes and not one cab drove by. Of course we both got sick. One year we finally had gotten a cab and he charged us $20 just to get in it. To me, my ideal new years eve is a dinner at a nice restaurant, say 9 o'clock reservations, with 3 or 4 other couples, good food, good drinks, 12 o'clock hits and I am out the door at 12:10. I haven't had that many memorable new years eve's, but hands-down my best ever was my junior year in high school, Eric Sulzer's party. Still the biggest party college or high school I had ever been to. Everyone from a 4 grade radius from Orange was there. At midnight, he was held up by the crowd and everyone was chanting "Ricky, Ricky, Ricky." Had to be the highlight of his life at that point. Tonight we are going to a Cartwright's in Cave Creek with Andy "call me Andrew" and his lovely new bride Jules "don't call me Julie" Rafal. Looking very much forward to it.

Rumors are swirling in Cleveland that first year GM Phil Savage is about to be fired because of "philosophical differences" with management. My inside sources tell me that owner Randy "daddy's little boy" Lerner was very concerned with Savage's ability to manage the salary cap when it cam to contract negotiations. He and team President John Collins seem to be in one corner, while Savage is in the other. Everyone knows the most important person in the organization is the guy who picks the players. Savage is a brilliant talent evaluator, yet Lerner seems to be in bed with Collins, a man who is a businessman first. This guy has no football credentials to speak of. That being said, he is the one running the money side of the organization and if Savage cannot negotiate contracts within the salary cap system, then that is on Collins and Lerner for hiring him. My sources tell me that the Browns organizational structure is the laughing stock of the league and these rumors are just the tip of the iceberg. Randy Lerner is no better than David Modell. Does he really want to start over again for a 4th time in 8 years? How much longer are these lemmings known as the Browns loyal fan base supposed to take this crap and continue to shell out their hard earned money? This disgrace of all of this is not that Savage may not have any clue at how to negotiate deals, but that this whole thing was leaked and then the Browns brass completely backtracked on the whole. What a joke.

Happy New Year to all the faithful blog readers....

Song of the Day: "Heard it All Before" by Sunshine Anderson

Day 74

Short and Sweet. Just got back from an hour and a half walk into the mountains of North Scottsdale. Saw all of these million dollar homes in nestled in between boulders, cactus, and desert. The weather couldn't be more perfect. It was just me, Casey, my ipod, and blue skies. That was all I needed. Its a great day to be alive. Would I be saying the same thing if I was in Chicago and it was 20 degrees and gray??????

Song of the Day: "Go" by Common

Day 73

Does it sound like a broken record when I say it is another beautiful day here? Yesterday Leah and I were lucky enough to spend a few hours with our niece and nephew. Jace was really happy to see us as always. I got a big hug, but all he wanted to do was see Casey the dog. Jace LOVES Casey, but the feeling isn't mutual. She is terrified of him because he runs after her calling her name. Reese had a pretty bad cold and it was so sad hearing her stuffed up self trying to breath. Seeing Lisa was interesting. In a way, I kind of feel sorry for her having to deal with these kids alone the majority of the time. But on the other hand, you reap what you sow. I don't even know if she realizes that or not. I felt kind of uncomfortable around her. This was the first time I have seen her and I have rarely spoken to her. I obviously was nice, but I literally had nothing to say to her other than talk about the kids. I didn't want to bring up Matt or the divorce because I was afraid of what she may say and that it may set me off, so we stayed neutral. First we went to the dog park, which had a ton of grass for Casey to run around. Jace and I threw a racquet ball for her to fetch. Nothing cuter than Jace saying "Ready, Case, 1, 2, 3, go get it girl!" After the dog park we went over to the adjacent kids park where we essentially fed ducks challah for 15 minutes before going to lunch at a deli. Jace had his usual "Chicky and Fries." I buried three solid mini-sandwiches, one corned beef, one chopped liver, and one turkey pastrami. Leah thought the Mushroom Barley soup was subpar. Really it was a nice afternoon with the kids. The baby was adorable and good as always. Jace was funny. I made sure when I was alone with both of the kids to talk about their daddy as much as I could. Even though the baby can't understand what I am saying, I wanted it to seep in to her subconscious.

I watched a little of the Michigan/Nebraska game last night and came away unimpressed. Kansas beat Nebraska 40-17 and we are average at best. So how does the great powerhouse program that is Michigan lose 32-28? Lloyd Carr is a terrible coach. This is danger time for UM football. This is a program that to me, should be challenging for a national title every year. Anything else should be deemed unacceptable to Michigan fans. Since Ohio State brought in Jim Tressel, OSU has owned Michigan. The great QB/RB tandem of Chad Henne and Michael Hart regressed this year. The defense has been subpar now for a few years. Time for Lloyd to put up or shut up. With the run OSU is currently on and Penn State's resurgence this year, he needs to step it up on te recruiting trail.

Leah, Scott, Lauren, and I went to Cold Stone Creamery after dinner last night. I will say this, the ice cream is great, but it is very rich and very expensive. Four small cups cost over $17. That being said, I think it is worth it. My go to is always the Birthday Cake ice cream, but I tried the Mint Chocolate Chip with brownies in it. Mint Chocolate chip from Baskin Robbins is by far my all time favorite ice cream, but Cold Stone's kind of tasted funky. Leah's Peanut Butter cup was "damn good." They had some really strange flavors there. One of the new ones was a blueberry ginger something or other. It looked real nasty. That place is a gold mind. Im sure it costs next to nothing to make their flavors and they charge an arm and a leg. My dad loved Cold Stone. They opened one at Eton Collection a few years ago. The day dad was diagnosed, he and Uncle Keith went there after dinner and there was a real long line. Dad, ever the jokester even in times of sadness, said to Uncle Keith, "I bet if I tell everyone I have cancer, we can cut to the front of the line." Classic Bobby D right there.

Special Props out to the Lauren Goto on her 20th b-day...

Song of the Day: "Redemption Song" by Bob Marley

Day 72

I asked Leah today to do a guest appearance on the blog and she declined, but said one of these she will. All is quiet in the Robuck house this morning. Max went to LA for the day for work, Scott and Lauren are still sleeping, Casey is napping, and Leah and her mom are chilling on the couch. We are going to see Lisa & the kids in about an hour. Dog Park, Kids Park, then lunch. Should be interesting.

Today I need to give props to my main man Doug Spear and his wife Andrea. At 12:42 PM yesterday in Atlanta, Andrea gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Natalie Hope Spear. She is 6 pounds, 5 ounces. We couldn't be happier for the both of them. Nobody deserves this more than Doug. When it comes to being a good friend, they don't come much better than Doug. Doug and Matt met at Camp Robin Hood in 1984 and instantly became friends. Over the years, Doug has been a big brother to me. My parents love him and I find it hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn't like him. I wish all three of them the best in the upcoming year.

Rafal and I went to the Insight Bowl last night. Arizona State beat Rutgers 45-40. In all of my years of watching football, I have never witnessed two worse defenses in my life. Jokingly, I called my father in law at halftime and said "this is like the 85 Bears and the 2000 Ravens." Seriously, there was over 1200 yards in total offense and the game was well over 4 hours. This is one thing I cannot stand about the college game - they are way too long. Why they feel the need to set the chains after every first down is beyond me. It slows everything down. The other thing that is crazy is how the oddsmakers continue to do it. The spread on last night's game was ASU -9.5. With 4 minutes left, ASU scored to go up by 12. They ended up winning by 5 on a last minute TD by Rutgers, but how do they know its going to be right around that 9.5 number? It amazes me everytime. The craziest thing is when Horizon league or MAC basketball games are nailed to the number. Talk about a fun job, setting sports lines. That is right up my alley.

Chat boards and talk radio speculation have pretty much taken over the sports and entertainment field. Every team, TV show, or band has their own set of die hard fans looking for the latest information. Most of it deals in rumors and speculation and there are so many half-truths out there that it is hard to believe anything anymore. Case in point, I checked my KU hoops chat board today and there was posting that some random guy wrote saying he read on the Depaul chat board that Freshman Julian Wright is homesick at KU and wants to transfer to Illinois at the end of the year. Now I for one don't believe it because this is a guy who in all of his quotes says he doesn't care about starting and committed to KU because he loved Bill Self. But the fact that these unsubstantiated rumors are out there are disturbing. Even if they aren't true, they kid may read this and it may plant a seed. It is what it is and it is our freedom of speech at work here.

Song of the Day: "The Blind Leading The Blind" By Geto Boys

Day 71

Another glorious day in Arizona. The weather this time of year is amazing. All the better for my big 4th annual trip down to Chase Field for the big Insight Bowl tilt between Arizona State and Rutgers with Rafal. In true Bob Dery fashion, I always make sure to hit the random sporting events everywhere I go. The last four years I have made the trek down to this meaningless bowl game, usually with my brother in law Scott and my father in law Max. Last year Notre Dame was out here and fore the first time there seemed to be more than 5 fans in the stands. Looking forward to it.

Anyone out there who has Sirius satellite radio needs to do me a favor and tune in tonight at 7:30 EST for the Pistons/Raptors game on channel 123. MD is doing play by play tonight with color man Rick Mahorn. If you have Sirius, tune in and give him a listen. He is a consummate professional and has a great radio voice. I am not just saying this because he is my brother, it is the truth. Of course I have Sirius not just for Howard, but so I can listen to him, but I am out in Arizona and won't be able to hear it. Good luck tonight Deez - we are all pulling for you and know you will do great.

Getting back to MD, I think about him everyday. He is going through such an unbelievable time with his divorce. The timing is very tough for him. Basketball season is his busiest time of year. Between U of Detroit play by play games and Pistons games, he is basically working every night on top of his regular shift at the station. He is traveling almost weekly. He is doing all of this while trying to figure out a balance of when and how he can see his kids and be there for them as much as he can be. I try to be as supportive as I can be, as does Leah, but there is only so much that we, as well as my mom, can do for him. Lisa has the kids out here in Scottsdale this week and Leah and I are going to see them tomorrow. We are going to go to the dog park because Jace love running around with Casey and there is an adjacent kids park there as well. It should be an interesting dynamic - this is the first time I have seen Lisa since they spilt up. It is all about the high road. I've been taking it for years with her and I will continue to do so for the sake of my niece and nephew.

As for MD - the stress that all of this is causing is very tough on him. I know things will work out for him in the end, but its a long process and takes a lot of getting used to. He will be fine. Since the stone setting I choose to keep my frame of mind positive and always believe that good things are ahead for me and my loved ones. But to quote the great Max Vermilion "its a marathon, not a sprint."

Song of the Day: "Wickedest Man Alive" by Naughty By Nature

Day 70

My friend Sean and I started this game years ago when we were in LA. If you see someone who looks like a celebrity but clearly he isn't, you say "unconfirmed" so and so. For example, people say my boy Dave looks like Dylan McDermott so he would be un-confirmed Dylan McDermott." If you see an actual celebrity, it is "confirmed" so and so. I have gotten many unconfirmed calls about me in my time. As a kid, I was the spitting image of Fred Savage, the great Kevin Arnold from "The Wonder Years." When he was in "The Princess Bride," I actually had people ask me if that was me. I have heard weaker ones in my time too, such as Jay Leno - who I cannot stand and is so unfunny and unoriginal. I've heard Robert Downey jr a few times lately as well. The best one ever happened the other night. Now I think this is a major stretch, but Leah's aunt told me that I look a lot like Colin Farrell. I will take unconfirmed Colin Farrell any day! If we could trade bodies and faces, that would be ok by me. Something tells me that underneath his clothes he isn't a hairy, out of shape Jew.

As everyone knows, yesterday was Christmas Day. Out here in Arizona, now this is the way to spend Christmas. White Christmas? Who needs its. I'll take sunny and 75 everytime. So what did we do yesterday? Like all good Jewish people, we went to the movies and ate Chinese food for dinner. Since we plan on seeing several movies in the next week, we had to pick one that was going to play to everyone, Munich was being planned for another day, so we saw "The Family Stone." I was anticipating a chick flick and was hoping I could get a nap in. Late afternoon movies can usually put me to sleep. The nap never happened and I really enjoyed the movie. I give it a good solid B. Great cast. Dianne Keaton and Craig T. Nelson play parents of a large family including Dermot Mulroney, Luke Wilson (who was great in a character reminding us of a cross between Cousin Steve and Dave), and Rachel McAdams. Sarah Jessica Parker and Claire Danes siblings from another family. I put this down as a solid rental.

My father in law has a 62 inch Mitsubishi DLP TV in the family room. Say it with me everyone, it is the whup. Watching sports in HD on this TV is like being there. Anyone who thinks that HD is overrated or that the difference isn't that drastic is fooling themselves. Nobody watches more sports than I do, and the HD experience makes such a huge difference. The far away shots are amazing, but the close up shots are even better. Watching Sportscenter in HD you literally can see the makeup on the anchors faces. HD technology is where its at. Lock me up for one of these TV's and an HD box when we move into a house.

I know that it was two days ago, but I still have to mention it. The fact that the Browns lost 41-0 on our home field to our so-called rival The Steelers is a joke. Its not even a rivalry anymore. In a rivalry, both teams win games at points. We rarely beat them anymore. They toy with us. Bill Cowher is 19-4 in his career against us. Saturday was a large step backwards in our development. Gotta love year 7 of the 5 year plan and we still are playing like an expansion team. I still see pieces in place that I like for the future. In this league where it doesn't take much to be good, there is no reason that with the right drafting and a few free agent signings, this team shouldn't at least be able to compete at .500 next year.

Song of the Day: "Norweigian Wood" by The Beatles

Day 69

Christmas day, live from beautiful Scottsdale, Arizona. We arrived here Friday night. I expected the airport to be mess, on top of the fact that travelling with Casey is always a possible problem. When traveling with Casey, she has to be drugged and put in a small bag under the seat in front of us. All airlines charge $165 for dogs to fly round trip, but there is an easy way to usurp the process. My friend Pav told me a couple of years ago that you never should pay. You get your boarding passes at either sky cap or one of the automatic machines and never let the agents see the dog. Then when you get to the security agent checking the boarding passes, you make sure the dog is zipped in the bag so they have no idea there is even a dog with you. Once you get passed that person, you are gold.

Anyways we got out unscathed, except for the fact that we flew Ted are there is literally about 5 inches of space between seats. As always, I take one for the team and sit in the middle so Leah can sleep by the window. You would think with the lack of space, the jack-asses wouldn't recline their seats, but of course the guy in front of me did. Nothing like 3 and a half hours of middle seat action! We got back to the house and had a great spaghetti and meatballs dinner, we are always fed unbelievably well by my mother in law. Tuned in to watch my Cavs almost blow a 20 point at home to the Pacers (We have serious problems with our half court offense, the other 4 players stand around and wait for Lebron to do something, and we chuck way too many threes, but that is another story for another day). There is a full house here, Jessica & Justin are here through tomorrow, Scott lives at home still, plus my inlaws so we are packed to the gills for a couple more days.

The weather could not be more beautiful. It is unseasonably warm here - its usually in the low to mid 60's during the day and cool at night. Yesterday reached 78 degrees and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. It does wonders for your mental health waking up to bright sunny skies and the quiet of the mountains surrounding you. We had a little 6 way putt putt tournament yesterday (Leah and I took them all down!) and afterwards I called for the late lunch at Chik-Fil-A. I buried both a chik no pick and an 8 piece nugget with the waffle fries dipped in Polynesian sauce. As always when eating chik-fil-a, I couldn't be happier. I luckily didn't waste any time busting my ass to go watch the Browns get disgraced at home by the Steelers 41-0. Its way too nice here to be spending my days inside. Last night we had prime rib and latkas. Another great meal.

This week I have lots relaxation planned. I am going to recharge for the new year. January 1 I start working out again and I am going on a diet. That is my new years resolution - I am going to get down to my ideal weight and in some sort of decent shape before our 11 weddings begin at the beginning of April. The beard sticks through the winter though. When I can, I will post a picture of it. It's looking real tough now. I am ready to bury people! hahahahahaha.

Song of the Day: "Margarettaville" by Jimmy Buffett. I heard this song yesterday in the car. As a kid, dad used to play this song all the time and Matt and I hated it. I always begged to have him change it. Dont know why. But I like it now and as the case with a million other things, it reminds me of him and better days when he was healthy and happy.

Day 68

Death is always a tragedy. When my father passed away I was crushed beyond words. As hard as it was, it was my father and that is what happens in life, your parents are supposed to be the ones who pass away before you do. Yesterday, tragedy struck Colts head coach Tony Dungy. His son James, 18 years old, was found dead in his Tampa apartment in what the Tampa police are calling an apparent suicide. I am not a parent, but I cannot even imagine how hard it is to lose a child. It is one thing to lose a child, its quite another to lose a child to an apparent suicide. That has to be something that sticks with you forever. You start to look in the mirror and constantly question yourself. Was this something that I could have prevented? Did my child's unhappiness have anything to do with me or my parenting? Its going to be a struggle for the rest of Tony and his wife's life.

Everything you read or hear about Tony Dungy is that he is one of the nicest and classiest guys you will ever want to meet. He is a family guy. He has been quoted as saying he doesn't want to be a coaching lifer because he wants to be able to do community work and help change people's lives for the better. This is such a sad story on all aspects. Up until my father died, I will be the first to admit, things this like were sad to me, but I would hear about them and brush them off. Now, I am so affected. To me, this is sadness of epic proportions for the Dungy family. I immediately put myself in their place and think about how my mother or father would be if either MD and I passed away. I said it before, nobody should ever have to lose a child. This is just another of the thousands of incidents that should put things into perspective for everyone. I know that is one thing that I have been a lot better at, not sweating the small stuff. Two years ago, something like my car needing $1000 in repairs would have set me off. But now, it is what it is. Its only money. In the grand scheme of late, that is so minute. What I am trying to say here is that take a step back from yourself from time to time and realize that all of the little things that get you so bent out of shape are nothing. Things could always be worse. You think Tony Dungy cares anymore that the Colts lost their perfect season this past Sunday?

Song of the Day: "The Choice is Yours" by Black Sheep

Day 67

Last work day before vacation. You gotta love that. Honestly though, this week is such a mail in job for most people. I was talking to my boss yesterday morning about a few things and he even said to me "this week is deader than dead for me, which means I know you aren't doing shit." There is truth in that. Today is a total mail in. Only at Leah's company are they running people like slaves today. The poor girl. This week is usually a light traffic week for her because many people are on vacation. So far, not this year. It took her an hour and 40 minutes to get home last night. I don't know how much longer she can take this commute.

Is there anything worse than stupidity? At Leah's company, they just had a round of mass layoffs and are headed in that same direction again after the first of the year. They have really started to crack down on people taking fake sick days. Tomorrow her office is closed, and she tells me this morning that this one woman called in sick. She also called in sick the day before her last scheduled vacation. How dumb are people? You know they are looking at you and are about to go through more layoffs and you take a sick day today? Genius. You know who takes today as a sick day? People like my schister ex-friend Caplin. The same guy who I just heard is now living in San Diego and is a used car salesman. Perfect job for that jamoke.

Ticket prices for big time sporting events are getting out of control. I am taking clients to the Kentucky/Kansas game in a couple of weeks in Lawrence. Leah is coming with as well. I just spent over $1100 for 4 tickets to a regular season game between a KU team who currently is 5-4 and looking average at best and a Kentucky team which lost to Indiana by 20 a few weeks back and is 7-3. I thought maybe the ticket price would have come down, but they haven't. Every broker I have spoken to and website I have looked at are the same. And I don't want you to think I'm sitting midcourt in the lower deck. I've got corner seats. The best seats are upwards of $850-$1000 a piece. That is a joke. That being said, I cannot wait to get back into the fieldhouse again. Allen Fieldhouse and Jacobs Field are my two sanctuaries. When I am doing yoga, they tell you to finish by taking yourself to your most serene place, the place where you are the happiest. You know where that is? The Jake, 5th row behind the Tribe dugout, on a beautiful sunny summer afternoon with my dad sitting right next to me.

For the first time since his death, Leah and I put in part of our wedding video. There are two parts, we watched the part that included the pre-wedding pictures and the ceremony (which we always fast forward through because it is so boring). I have looked at plenty of pictures of my father since he died, but I was almost scared to watch a video tape. There was dad with mom, smiling, joking, and walking around. He looked so good. He was very thin and he and mom looked so happy. It just broke my heart. I couldn't hold back tears. It was just so hard to watch. At some point I was going to have to watch it again, and we felt like we were ready. I'm glad we did it, but it just again illustrates to me how unfair it was that he was taken away from us. The guy the was the best. No ifs ands or buts about it. And I miss every single second of everyday.

Song of the Day" "Girl" by Beck

Day 66

Nobody said life was fair, or even sports for that matter. But here we are again, on Dec 21, and the Yankees have again snagged the prize of the free agent market, CF Johnny Damon. Damon signed a 4 year, $52 million deal with the Yanks last night, leaving the rival Red Sox for greener pastures and more green. The Yankees starting lineup now features eight players who make over $10 million a year. Their starting rotation's payroll for the third consecutive year will be more than the entire payroll of the Indians. Does the sport of baseball, the national pastime, have an even playing field?

Lets take a look at something. It is an easy and convenient excuse for Tribe fans or A's fans or Twins fans to throw up their hands and say "well, season's already over, the Yankees got Damon in CF to go with A-Rod at third, Jeter at short, Sheffield in right, and horses like Randy Johnson and Mariano Rivera anchoring their pitching staff. How are we supposed to compete?" But how many World Series titles have the Yankees won since they have gone to the "lets go out and buy the best free agent in the market every year" plan? That would be zero. They don't have the intangible guys like a Paul O'Neill, a Scott Brosius, a Tino Martinez in his prime. They may knock the crap out of the ball and have no holes in their lineup, but pitching wins championships, as the White Sox showed us last year. Look at the Yankees bullpen situation. From year to year, they scramble to find good set up men to get the ball to Mariano Rivera, and their lack of quality in the pen has cost them dearly. Last year they signed Felix Rodriguez away from the Giants and he was a bust. They brought back Mike Stanton, he was a huge bust. Paul Quantrill? bust. Things were so bad for them that by season's end, they were fighting for their lives with essentially a 3 man bullpen of Tom Gordon, Tanyon Sturtze, and Rivera. And how did they do in the playoffs? Loser in round 1. This year they are going to try hothead Kyle Farnsworth and Octavio Dotel who is coming off of Tommy John surgery and wont be ready until July. Having the head to play under the bright lights of the New York media and fans in something that must be taken into account. Not everyone can handle it. Just ask Jeff Weaver, Javier Vazquez, and Ed Whitson.

Now take a look at the White Sox last year. Their lineup didn't overwhelm anyone. They had their big bopper in Paul Konerko who seemed to get the big hit everytime he needed to. But more importantly, their lineup was not loaded with guys who try to hit the ball out of the ballpark everytime. They knew how to move runners, they could bunt, they could hit and run, they hit sacrifice flies. The Yankees far too often rely on the three run homer. That is the trap the Tribe fell into down the stretch last year. Compare the pitching and you see why the Sox did what they did last year. Their rotation was the best in the league and their bullpen was deep and rock solid from both sides. They had Dustin Hermanson and Bobby Jenks both capable of finishing games, Cliff Pollite and Luis Vizcaino from the right side, Neil Cotts and Damaso Marte from the left side. Ozzie Guillen had 6 guys (5 really, Marte was in the doghouse) he knew he could count on and didn't need to burn anyone out, unlike Joe Torre who caused Tom Gordon's arm to nearly fall off. Their payroll last season was in the $75 million range, which is less than half of the Yankees.

The Tribe won 93 games with a $42 million payroll, good enough to make the playoffs in any other year since baseball went to the three division format in 1994 except one. The A's, if not for Bobby Crosby's broken hand, probably win the AL West with a payroll in the $50 million range. Its all about developing young talent, having depth in your pitching staff, staying injury free and having some calculated risks work out for you. The Tribe doesn't win 93 games without the signings of Bob Howry and Scott Sauerbeck in the bullpen. Both guys were signed the year before when nobody else wanted them after they had arm problems. They don't win without Juan Gonzalez getting hurt and therefore thrusting stud prospect CF Grady Sizemore into the everyday lineup. They don't win if all 5 starters hadn't stayed relatively healthy all year long. We will never again see a season where all 5 guys make 30 starts. Never again.

So the question remains, is it an even playing field? The answer is somewhere between yes and no. If you are a big market team, you have a bigger margin for error because you can sign over your past mistakes. If you are a small market team, you have to have a strong farm system, good young talent that doesn't take up a lot of payroll, and you cannot afford to make a big mistake in free agency. The Matt Lawton signing was a blessing in disguise for Tribe GM Mark Shapiro. Because Lawton was such a huge bust after signing a 4 year $28 million deal, Shapiro makes the smart moves going after guys he knows are proven commodities. He knows a good bargain and knows good young talent. Would I rather have the Yankees payroll? Of course I would. But can the Indians win under this current economic structure? Yes, but the odds aren't in our favor.

Song of the Day: "Funky Dividends" by Three Times Dope

Day 65

Today's blog entry is going to be my best and worst of the year when it comes to sports and entertainment. Feel free to tell me if you agree or disagree in the comments section. This was figured out the old fashion way - if it I saw it or watched it and it came out or was shown in 2005, it qualifies. And now I present to you, TD's best and worst of 2005:

Movies: This was one of the worst years for movies in recent memory. I literally had to scrape to get to these.

Best Comedy: "Wedding Crashers" - I did find this movie hilarious at times and did quite a bit of laughing out loud, but it was about 15 minutes too long and the whole Owen Wilson/Vince Vaughn being his same character recipe is getting stale. We just got The 40 year old Virgin and haven't seen it yet. It is earmarked for the plane ride to Arizona.

Best Drama: "Cinderella Man" - I really enjoyed this underdog story of fighter Jim Braddock. It also re-assured me of two things. One - Russell Crowe may be a pompous a-hole, but he is one hell of a lead actor. Two - Renee Zellweger gets increasingly annoying in every movies she puts out.

Worst Movie: "Jarhead" - I want to personally write a letter to the the producers, writers, directors, and Jake Gylenhaal and ask for my $10 bucks and that hour and a half of my life back.


Most Overrated: "Crash" - Was there anything worse than Oprah stroking this movie to no end and the "what was your Crash moment" resets for like 4 months afterwards? It was good, not great.

Most Underrated: "Hitch" - This Will Smith flick kind of flew under the radar but was very funny. Kevin James was the perfect guy to play the down on his luck, unstylish loser who is transformed by Smith's smooth character, Alex Hitchins.

TV: People who know me say that I watch way too much TV. You won't hear me argue that. Tivo is the greatest invention since the Internet. Most shows are watched early Saturday or Sunday mornings after the dog wakes me up.

Best TV Show, Comedy: "Entourage" - This is fastly becoming one of my favorite shows of all time with Dallas, Seinfeld, and the Sopranos. There is never a bad episode. Turtle and Drama are hysterical and Ari is the perfect side compliment to the crew. Plus they had a ton of great cameos this season including James Cameron, Mandy Moore, Ralph Macchio and the best of all, Bob Saget as himself smoking weed and having a "house account" at a brothel.

Best TV Show, Drama: "Grey's Anatomy" - Readers of this blog know what a fan of this show I am. Well scripted and extremely well acted. Patrick Dempsey has to win the comeback of the year award. He has come a long way since Ronald Miller and Randy the pizza delivery boy.

Worst TV Show, Comedy: "The Comeback" - I couldn't get through 5 minutes of this unintelligible garbage. Lisa Kudrow wasn't funny as Phoebe and she still isn't funny.

Worst TV Show, Drama: "desperate Housewives" - Some may say this should fall in the most overrated category, but to me, it is flat out bad. The first season I watched and thought it was ok, didn't understand what the buzz was all about. But this season, I watched two episodes and said I am done. It tries to be funny and isn't and the story lines are about as stale as a 4 year old Davis bakery rye. The only saving grace is that Eva Longoria is smokin hot.

Most Underrated: "Weeds" - This Showtime original series about a late 30's widow (played by Mary Louise Parker) who becomes a suburban pot dealer is pure genius. Elizabeth Perkins is also great as a neurotic mother who finds out she has breast cancer and changes her entire life existence.

Most Overrated: "Lost" - Another show that I tried to get into and just couldn't. From what I understand, the second season has been a major disappointment.

Best Reality Show: The Amazing Race, Season 7 - This was a tough call. Race narrowly beats out Laguna Beach, Survivor: Guatemala, and Big Brother. The end of the 2004 season finished in February, so it counts. Great villains in this show including the most reviled man in Race history, the verbally abusive Jonathan and his wife Victoria. The challenges and the racing throughout the world always have me on the edge of my seat. This was a Bobby D favorite.

Worst Reality Show: Real World, Austin - In a landslide. This show has just begun to wear on me. I am officially done with Real World's after this show. These people are all mentally disturbed. Especially Nehamiah, the resident angry black man. It had potential as the season started with Melinda, the hot, sexual explicit one. But she was all talk and no action and immediately started dating her roommate Danny. That essentially killed the season.

Most Underrated: Breaking Bonaduce - The first half of the season was appointment TV. Danny Bonaduce is seriously one of the craziest people I have ever see on TV.

Most Overrated: American Idol - talk about old bits.

Sports - Again, some say I watch too many sporting events (i.e. Leah), and again, they are right. But when you need a question answered about sports, I am your man.

Game of the Year: USC 34 Notre Dame 31 - I didn't see this entire game because I had to leave for a wedding, but it is hard to argue that any game had more drama. USC's 30 plus game winning streak on the line, the 4th and 11 completion from Matt Leinhart to Dwayne Jarrett that saved the season. The game winning TD on the last play of the game. Others receiving consideration include Gonzaga's triple OT win against Michigan State at the Maui Invitational in college hoops, The White Sox 7-6 win in game 2 of the World Series with the Konerko Grand Slam and the Podsednik Walkoff HR.

Team of The Year: The Chicago White Sox - As much as it pains me to write this, they led from wire to wire and thoroughly dominated the playoffs. The dismantled my Indians in their quest for the playoffs the last week of the season. All year I kept saying they were lucky, and they were. But I'd rather be lucky than good. I give credit where credit is due.

Performance of the year, single game: Reggie Bush, RB USC vs. Fresno State - I have never seen a player dominate in a single game in his sport since Michael Jordan. I watched the Fresno State/USC game in which he had 295 yards rushing and everytime he touched the ball he seemed to run for 50 yards. But it wasn't just the pure speed, it was the cutbacks. This guy is a once in a lifetime special talent.

Goat of the Year: Donald Fehr, chief council for the baseball players union - This guy has been at the forefront of the strongest union in sports and to me, is part of the downfall of the game. He had every opportunity to help the cause of cleaning baseball of performance enhancing drugs and he kept dragging his feet until Congress eventually called him to the carpet.

Tribe Moment of the Year: Travis Hafner's 4 HR 9 RBI doubleheader against Detroit - I basically watched the Tribe every night and I happened to be in Arizona for these two games. The day portion on the double dip was on ESPN also I caught it. The man was hotter than baked clams. Love my guy Pronk. Too bad Manager Eric Wedge sat him the next day. A close second was the 9 run 9th inning in Kansas City when Jeff Liefer's popout was dropped in left causing the comeback of epic propotions to be complete.

Kansas Basketball Moment of the Year: Keith Langford's buzzer beater against Georgia Tech on New Year's Day - Keith's career peaked during his sophomore year as a complimentary part to Nick Collison and Kirk Hinrich. The team severely underachived last season behind the 4 seniors, but Keith was the king of disappearing the whole game and then showing up at the end when we needed him. A close second was Wayne Simien's 28 and 15 performance against Oklahoma State where he would not let us lose.

Browns Moment of the Year: Reuben Droughns dominating performance against Miami in a Browns 22-0 win - Droughns had 166 yards and a TD including a 75 yard punishing run through the Miami defense. Droughns became the first Brown since 1985 to be a 1000 yard rusher.

Cavaliers Moment of the Year: Lebron James's three point outburst against The Hornets - In a dominating performance, Lebron hit 6 of 7 three's, including 5 straight in the 109-87 win. Lebron finished with 31 points.

Day 64

I have received several "complaints" of late that I am lacking in good material these days and that some of my readers are bored. I'll say this, while I do love the feedback and the fact that this blog has become a part of people's everyday routine- nobody is putting a gun to anyone's head telling you you have to read this. So in my never ending quest to entertain my friends and family - I pledge to you all that I will come strong as often as I can.

With my Friday blog tribute to the great Howard Stern, I failed to mention that it was the second birthday of the great Casey the dog. I never meant to shortchange her. We had a small birthday party for her this morning. She got a dradle treat, a new toy, and two new shirts. Now I will be the first person to admit that I think dog clothes are ridiculous. I never wanted a dog, but when we got her, I said my dog will NEVER wear clothes in my presence. Seriously, is there anything worse than seeing dogs with jackets and little booties on? It is flat out embarrassing. That being said, Casey looks really cute in her shirt, however the shirts will never be seen on her in public with me. Maybe with Leah, but not with me.

We went to a Hanukkah party tonight at our friend's Michael and Michelle's house in the suburbs. They just moved up there after years in the city. We covered the whole gambit of topics at dinner including was wet wipes vs. toilet paper, back waxing, how Michael and Michelle's 3 and 5 year olds love to say the F word incessantly, cousin Steve, the pros and cons of the HD tivo box, and The Clapper just to name a few. I'll just say this - Michelle's artichoke dip is seriously one of the best things I've eaten in a long time. It is the epitome of my favorite phrase - the whup.

In the world of sports, I am starting to get concerned about the lack of movement by my Tribe. I see the White Sox improving what is already the best rotation in baseball, while trading for my favorite player of all time, Jim Thome, to DH. All we have done is watch our top set up man Bob Howry price himself out of our league and go to the Cubs, and sign Paul Byrd for $7 million a year. We still haven't addressed the gaping holes in RF and first base. If I have to watch another year of Casey Blake in RF, I may throw up. The Dolan's cheapness is already an old bit. I just hate being reminded of it every offseason.

They recently passed the smoking ban in Chicago for all bars and restaurants. I couldn't be any more excited about it. It supposedly is going to take effect January 1. I cannot tell you how much I am looking forward to coming home from bars and not reeking of cigarettes. Everytime I go to California, I come back saying how lucky they are to have the ban in place. It works in LA. It works in San Francisco. It works in New York City and Boston. It even works in Lawrence, Kansas - my college town. I'm surprised it took so long to go into effect here.

Mad props go out to "Boss" Ross Glick and Ags for their solid performances this weekend.

Song of the Day: "She's Crafty" by The Beastie Boys

Day 63

Today is day 63. My dad would be 63 years old if he were still with us. So this entry is about something we both shared and loved. My alarm was set this morning for 4:58am. Why you ask? Today is the last day on terrestrial radio for the King of all Media, Howard Stern. The show is about halfway over as I am typing this. Howard is holding a big rally outside of his studio and the crowd is crazy. The whole crew is going to be addressing the crowd in an hour or so. In the last segment he had his whole family in the studio, including his three daughters who have never been on the air. His parents are there. It seems like everyone ever associated with the show in any capacity over the last 20 years is there. All I can think about is that my dad is missing this whole thing. Nobody, and I mean nobody, would be enjoying this more than he would be. Artie started to talk about how this is such a moving experience for him because unlike the rest of the crew, he was grew up listening to Howard with his father every single day and started as a fan before becoming a regular member of the show. I know this may sound ridiculous to most people, especially non-Howard fans, but I can relate to what Artie was saying. My dad first turned me on to Howard when he first came to Cleveland in 1993. I listened every single morning with my father in the kitchen before school and in my car on the way to school. I have been a loyal fan ever since, but nobody was a more loyal fan of Howard's than Bobby D.

This is the constant misconception about Stern fans - they are a bunch of misfits and trash. My father certainly is as class of an act as there was and he was Howard's biggest fan. Did he sometimes take it too far? Sure. But I respect a guy who would only schedule meeting post 10 am so he wouldn't miss any of the show. When Howard came to Cleveland to do a mock funeral of the local morning man John Lannigan, Dad was down in the flats where the show took place, getting a prime position at 5am to see him live. Over the years, we have had probably thousands of conversations about the show. My mother's running joke that in any conversation, whether it be politics, food, entertainment, whatever - her reply was "it all come back to Howard."

Again, nobody would be loving this show today more than he would. How is it that I can get sad listening to this? It is what it is. Howard is just one of the many things that remind me of my dad every single day. I miss him beyond what words in a blog can say. They say time heals all wounds, and while I do agree that as time goes by, it gets a tad easier, it never gets goes away entirely.

Song of the Day: "The End" by The Doors

Day 62

Last night my friends Sturch and Kaitz were both in town and we went to dinner at Mia Francesca. Sturch is in on a break from his job working at a camp for troubled kids in Utah and Kaitz is driving back through with his girlfriend from St. Louis to his home in Minneapolis. First things first, that restaurant is the whup. It was a Wednesday night and they were wall to wall people. They hooked us up with a free round because our table wasn't ready on time. In vintage Sturch fashion, he ordered 4 teasers for 5 people. We ate a ton of food, laughed a ton, and reminisced about the old days. Sturch and I were roommates my 5th year at KU. Kaitz was introduced to me by his friend from home and a friend of mine at KU Annie K. Kaitz was transferring to KU from Wisconsin-Eau Claire and Annie told me during the summer that her friend was moving in right next to me and that we would really get along. I will never forget telling her "I have enough guy friends." So he moved in next door to me and Sturch and it was basically on from day one. We totally hit it off. What is crazy is that we only really spent about 6 months living in the same city and we have been very close ever since. It is strange how things work out like that.

I know I speak for Sturch when I say there is nobody that we know that is more rock solid than BK. I can honestly say I don't know anyone who doesn't like him. He was one of many of my friends who stepped it up big time when dad got sick and passed away. We have spent several great times together including two trips to Las Vegas and several late night Harrah's runs in Lawrence. Kaitz took me to game 1 of the 2002 ALCS in the metrodome where his Twins took on the Angels. We took in KU's final four blow out of Marquette in April of 2003. Many many trips to the bars in Minneapolis, Lawrence, and Chicago. The thing I am happiest about for him is that he has found a great girlfriend in Sara. I have been lucky enough to spend some time with her (including last night at dinner) and the two of them are very cute together. They have been doing the long distance thing for a while and it looks as though she'll be moving to Minneapolis this summer. Its a real good thing for both of them and I couldn't be happier. Brent has been through a lot in his life and he deserves this.

Song of the Day: "Love Street" by The Doors

Day 61

I am so cold. Freezing. Why do we live in this cold weather? I know nothing other than this crap in the winter for my entire life. From Cleveland to Kansas to Chicago. I have spent my winter months inside freezing my ass off. This winter so far seems to be a litter more bitter to me. Its mostly because last winter I was numb to what was going on outside because of the inner strife I was dealing with. That and the fact that we used to have Casey go to the bathroom on these pee pads in the house half of the time for the sole reason of not having to make extra trips outside. So she would go ont he pad twice a day and we would take her out three times in a day. We fazed those out completely, mostly because it was disgusting, but she needs 5 walks a day ad I am doing 4 of them usually. Leah always does the worst one, early morning when she wakes up, as as she says "that counts as two." Plus since I work from home, I have to do the day walks. I know I go through this every winter, I always talk about how we should be living in either California and Arizona. We actually were considering it a few years back, but as usual, I am all talk. I think the city gets to me in the winter too. The summers here are amazing. There is no better place to be during the summer. The problem is this city has two seasons only. Its either extremely hot or bitter cold. There is literally no in between months. I totally get the people who move out west or too the Florida and never come back. My dad used to say that he loved living in the Midwest because he "loved the changing of the seasons." That was just another example of my father putting his positive spin on yet another topic.

Song of the Day: "The Light" by Common

Day 60

I'll say this - no chance anyone thought I would make it to 50, let alone 60. Its hard to come up with solid material, but I always have a lot on my mind. I am moving more in the direction of short ramblings on on occasions doing blogs about one subject.

Casey threw up twice yesterday, once in the morning and once on her way back in last night. Because the snow is still piled so high, I have to take her out in our gated parking lot to have her run around and go to the bathroom. The good news is that she runs around off leash. The bad news is that she keeps eating dirty snow and it caught up with her. Anyone who doesn' t think his is good practice for a kid is crazy.

My least favorite celebrities by far are Jamie Foxx and Ashlee Simpson. Jamie Foxx, you won an Oscar for a good impression of Ray Charles, and because of that, we were exposed to insufferable and annoying interviews on him for two years. How many more times can this guy tell the world about his grandmother? Talk about old bits. Dude talks more about his grandmother than I talk about my father. Look at his filmography on imdb.com. Tell me what other part he ever played that was memorable? Ali? That movies was as long as it was boring. Before Ray, he was in those timeless pieces of art like "Held Up," "Booty Call," and "Breakin' All The Rules" to name a few. The best thing he ever did was his song about Serena Williams as host of the Espy's. And then there is Ashlee Simpson. She is an absolute no talent. Why does anyone care that she is now dating her strange looking guitar player or that she had an eating disorder when she was 11? 11? I love how that story was put out there the week after her sister announced her split with Nick Lachey. Like her puppet- master father didn't purposely leak that at the exact right time to take the focus away from Jessica.

Here is a question - what guy would go see the new movie "Brokeback Mountain?" If you aren't familiar, this is essentially the story of two guys who lead straight lives, get married, have kids, but are really in love. I am far from homophobic, but you couldn't pay me to go see this movie. Any guy who goes with their wife or girlfriend to see this movie also needs to check their pants to make sure they still have testicles. This movie however received 7 golden globe nominations this morning.

Browns fans like me are enjoying what we are seeing for the future with rookie QB Charlie Frye. I don't know what it is, but I just like the way the kid plays. He is smart, tough, and shows solid moxie. Its a shame Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow are hurt. We would have some solid pieces on offense along with RB Reuben Droughns.

Does anyone think this war in Iraq will ever end? Where is the exit strategy? If I am a person looking to run for president in the next election, all I am going to work on in my campaign is having an exit strategy planned that I can go public with. Talk about something that will make you popular. Even most of these pro-Bush honks out there cannot be happy with what is going on there. And what is exactly going on in Iraq anyways other than our soldiers dying everyday?

Song of the Day: "21 Questions" by 50 Cent

Day 59

Can we just get passed these next couple of weeks? I have a lot to get accomplished before Leah, Casey, and I head to Arizona to relax and visit my in laws. I absolutely love it out there. It is such a different world from the craziness of the city here. It isn't half as crowded. The weather this time of year is great - perfect golf weather. During the day it is in the mid to high 60's with zero humidity and at night it gets cool. We go out there every year at this time. Basically the trip consists of relaxation, movies, shopping, and eating. These next two weeks can't go by fast enough for me.

I just finished my worst fantasy football season of alltime. I was literally the worst team in the league after winning back to back years. I have moved over into paying more attention to the actual games themselves and I will say this, there is so bad football being played. Other than the Colts, its bad football. I watched Jacksonville play last week and they have one of the best records in the league. They wouldn't win 6 games if this were 1987. The Cowboys/Chiefs game was very entertaining, but both teams took turns trying to let the other team win. I've said this once, I'll say it again, Gambling and Fantasy Football is masking this sub-par product they are putting out there every week.

Would you consider me strange if I told you that I love getting a pedicure?

I watched the Survivor finale last night, it was solid. Leah and I were big Survivor fans, then we stopped watching for probably 4 seasons or so before picking this one back up. It was a great season. Anyways, the winner (if you don't want to know who won, stop reading here) was this woman who was from Kansas, Danni. She had said during the show that she was a big Kansas basketball fan and that the team seems to get close to winning it all every year, but can't seem to do so, so she wanted to bring a championship to Kansas. Classic. Anyways, this woman is very tall and skinny. I saw her done up at the reunion show and she was smokin hot when she was all cleaned up. Then I read she was a former Miss Kansas. Remember where you heard this first, she will definitely be in Playboy.

It was good to hear that others, not just me, were very confused by the movie Syriana that we saw on Saturday night. My friend Sheri saw it yesterday and was in the same boat. We also ran into Jessica's future sister and brother in law at the grocery store yesterday and they saw it as well. They are both a lot smarter than I am and they said they were confused as well. Now I don't feel so dumb. I have decided that I have to see it again at some point, knowing what I know, and maybe that will help me understand it better.

Just heard that Stan Van Gundy, the head coach of the Miami Heat resigned due to "family reasons" and now Pat Riley is coming down from the president job to take over as head coach. That is a bunch of crap. This is what I hate about pro sports. A story was out there all summer that Riley has the "itch" to coach again, but there is no way he could fire Van Gundy. They are 11-10 and Shaquille O'Neal hasn't played since the second game of the season. Riley added a bunch of me-first veterans to their mix in the offseason, almost setting Van Gundy up to fail. Why can;t anyone in pro sports be honest for once and say the REAL reason someone is fired or "resigned." Riley should have the balls to come out and say "you know what, I think I want to coach again and think I can do better than Stan, that is why I am taking over." That family reasons garbage is just that, garbage.

Song of the Day: "Time for Some Action" by Redman

Day 58

Went to see Syriana last night with Jaime and Steve and Brett and Jolie. It has gotten very good reviews and I hadn't heard much about it. To quote Frank Costanza, "I like to go in fresh." I would give it a B, B-. First of all, you have to pay very close attention to what is going on, because you seriously have no idea who is who and what is going on until the end of the movie. While do like movies like that, this is a very "smart" movie if you will. Good solid cast and was acted very well. I heard that George Clooney gained 35 pounds for this role. That had literally zero to do with his part. He could have kept off the weight and he would have been exactly the same. I did like it, didn't love it, but would advise seeing it. It is very interesting.

After the movie we went to a late dinner at Boston Blackies, which supposedly is known for having the best burgers in the city. I'll say this. I've had a lot better in the city. The best burger in the Chicagoland area bar none is Charlie Beinlich's in the burbs. Beinlich's is one of those out of the way, hole in the wall places that is a must stop for visitors. A close second for me is the Cheeseburger at Joe's Stone Crab. Even though it is known for its seafood and steaks, their bar food is unreal. Yet another one of the various reasons it is by far my favorite restaurant anywhere. The Merk's cheddar spread burger at Mystic Celt on Southport is another one of my favorites. I will NEVER understand vegetarian's. Steaks and burgers are the whup. Period, end of sentence.

Good to see my Jayhawks bounce back yesterday and beat Cal 69-56. We came out flat again and were trailing by 4 at the half, but stepped it up in the second half. I am trying to stay patient with this team, and I saw some definite growth yesterday, but we still have a long way to go. My main concern is McDonalds's All American point guard Mario Chalmers. He only played 11 minutes and looked awful 6 turnovers and 2 points. His minutes were taken by a walkon who never plays, Stephen Vinson. That is not a good sign for Mario.

Why is it that nobody in this city had an idea how to drive in the snow? It took us 40 minutes to get downtown to go to the movies last night on a drive that normally takes 15. I was heavy on the horn yesterday, and Leah continues to tell me that I am going to honk at the wrong person once and we are going to get shot.

Song of the Day: "Can't Truss It" by Public Enemy

Day 57

Good old #57 Clay Matthews. Ags told me the other day that Clay and Ozzie Newsome were his two all time favorite Browns. Dad and I used to have a laugh at every Browns game over him. Across the way from our seats, there was always a sign that had an arm curled up in an upside down flex position and it said "Clay 57." Dad and I used to always look at each other and say "The arm of Clay." Kinda stupid, but it was one of our several inside jobs.

Yesterday starting around 2:15-2:30 it started to snow here like crazy. Right in time for rush hour traffic, the snow gods let loose and we had a mini-blizzard. Luckily for me, I work from home, so it didn't affect me as much. Also luckily for me, Leah had taken the train to work. If she wouldn't have, it would have probably taken her 3-4 hours to get home, no exaggeration. I called my friend Sean and his fiancee Nancy works in Glenview, which is about 10 miles closer to the city than Leah's office. He told me it took her 3 hours to get home and she left at 2:45. As bad as the weather was, it was the timing of it all. I love snow. I do. But the problem in this city is that they have no idea how to plow in this city. The roads were terrible last night as were the sidewalks. The snow was piled so high, on my walks with Casey last night she was literally buried all the way up. She could only hop from place to place to get to higher ground. It was so cute. The other problem is that she loves the snow and wants to stay outside, which clearly is not happening.

Back to the roads, the only plow the main streets here. So this morning when I took Leah to the train station, the main roads were totally fine. But I take a lot of side streets. They are completely untouched. People are sliding all over the place, not to mention the fact that every side street is lined with parked cars. So one skid or wrong turn and you can hit a parked car. Its been this way forever. Gotta give Cleveland credit, now they know how to plow.

Also wanted to say a quick word about John Lennon. Yesterday was the 25th anniversary of his death. Readers of this blog know what a big fan of the Beatles I am. John was so amazingly creative, he and Paul together were probably the best songwriting duo of all time. I was not into his post Beatles solo stuff as much, but he did have some great tunes. As my man Mark P said yesterday in our discussion of this The Beatles essentially set all the trends and created a cultural phenomenon is the span of 7 years. My friend Jeremy has said to me for years that you are either a John guy or a Paul guy, and he is a John guy. I am somewhere in the middle, but lean towards John.

Song of the Day: "Imagine" by John Lennon

Day 56

This morning I was thinking about how I said in the last year I wanted to be a better person. In the weeks after dad died, I received a ton emails, phone calls, and cards from people. As much as I appreciated everything that my friends had done for me, it was the randoms that seemed to resonate with me the most. I received cards and emails from people that I hadn't seen since high school, who wrote to tell me how they always loved my father. I received an email from a girl I dated briefly in my freshman year before Leah who said how she will always remember how nice my father was when he came to Lawrence to visit. Even friends of my friends sent their kind wishes. Of the many well wishes I received, the one that stuck with me the most was from a girl a barely knew. She is a friend of our friend Randi who I had only met a few times and probably had never said more than 10 words to. Her mother had passed away from cancer earlier in the year. It was just a simple card saying "I've been there, if you ever want to talk." I cannot tell you how far that went with me.

On the flip side of that, you also remember the people who don't step up or contact you in any way. Now I know that most people do not know what to say, I can can totally speak to that watching so many try to express their sorrow to me. Two examples stick with me. My ex-friend Caplin, who I had a major falling out with, had every opportunity to get back in my good graces by sending me an email or a card. I know he knew what had happened, but of course, I got nothing from him. The other thing that bothered me recently was last week in Cleveland I ran into my old high school girlfriend Lara. I haven't seen or spoken to her in years. She says "I totally meant to call you last year, but I'm so sorry about your dad." You know what? You may have meant to call, but you didn't, just stick with "I was so sorry to hear about your dad" and call it a day. That was a lame excuse. And honestly, I never even thought about her not calling or sending a card for one second until she said that.

Last week, Beth - a girl I know from the KU circle who is a few years younger than me - her father passed away due to complications from prostate cancer. When I heard the news, I said to Leah that we must send a card. I know her, but not all that well. But I know how important it is to get well wishes from not just friends, but from acquaintances as well. I'm not trying to tell anyone how to live there life, I can only tell you how I feel. Whenever you can in situations like this, you should always step up and send a card. Its not that hard.

Song of the Day: "Summertime in the LBC" by Dove Shack

Day 55

My mom went to Florida yesterday to relax, play golf and spend some time with friends. Lets just say she deserves it. Last winter she spent a lot of time traveling to both coasts of Florida and Arizona. Winter in Cleveland can be tough for her. The Summer and spring are a lot easier. Anyone who knows my mom knows she is an absolute golf fanatic. She plays probably 5-6 times a week during the summer. So when she can go on trips like this and play winter golf, it is right up her alley. Its not like she needs to be in Cleveland to watch the Browns playoff push.

My mom is a pretty amazingly strong woman. The year she had to endure I wouldn't wish on anyone. After being an unbelievable advocate for my father and watching the man she loved for 34 plus years pass away, she seemed to be doing better than expected. I cannot tell you how many people had told me how my mom seemed to be unbelievably strong. I think things were on their way to being settle and then she got received the news that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer. As tough as she has been, I don't think she ever thought this was going to happen to her and so quickly. Luckily for her, the cancer was caught very early and was cut out with surgery and radiation. Thanks goodness she didn't need chemotherapy. After watching what the chemo did to my father, I know I can speak for my mom when I say she was not prepared to go through that again. She came through this all like a champ. I was a lot more scared than she was, at least what she was letting on to me.

Its funny because as I had said in my eulogy for my father that he was the glass half full guy, but my mom was the glass half empty woman and that is why they worked so well together. I know that the last year has really changed her views on a lot of things. I think now she sees that life is too short to get hung up over things that are out of her control. Her patience, or lack there of, still hasn't changed. There is nothing better than watching her walk to and from the hostess stand at a restaurant while waiting for a table. The lack of patience there is in direct conflict with the patience she has with her grandchildren. She is an unbelievable grandmother. Jace just adores her.

Between my losing her husband, her bout with breast cancer, and my brother's impending divorce, this has been quite a 14 month stretch for her. I can honestly say I am so proud at how she has handled herself. Most others couldn't have done what she has done. I am one grateful son. So to my mother, I say relax, have fun in Florida, hit them straight, and stay warm, because it is bitter cold here in the Midwest.

Song of the Day: "Give Thanks and Praise" by Sizzla

Day 54

I apologize for not being able to post a blog yesterday. Comcast, my joke of an internet and cable provider, has been essentially on the fritz for the last 3 days. Every winter the same thing happens. It gets freezing cold (10 degrees today again) and there is a outage. My cable and internet were out last night. My cable still isn't working properly this morning, but my internet is working, but very slowly. Of course I have to sit here waiting for them to come out here today "between 11 and 1." What are the odds that they actually show up in the 11 o clock hour? I'm going with slim and none.

My internet being out from about 3PM till this morning made me realize something. I have become so reliant on the internet for all of my information. Whether it be my email, sports information, news, etc, I need to have access as often as I can. This past summer, We spent three days in rural New Hampshire and Maine staying at a bed and breakfast with no tv and no internet. I was going crazy. I felt like I was on an island and didn't know what was going on in the world one bit. Of course, instead of worrying about world news, I was more concerned that I couldn't see a Tribe box score.

The good news of yesterday was that my Sirius satellite radio finally got here and has been set up. With the cable out, this was a great opportunity for me to listen to Howard 100, Howard Stern's channel. I've been eagerly anticipating this and listening to the Howard 100 News was quite interesting. Who knew they could do serious hard news about Howard and all of his various chronies and make it sound legit. Leah turned to me during dinner and said that this was making her so sad, because nobody would have loved listening to this more than Dad. He would have had Sirius in his car and several radios set up throughout the house. Mom used to refer to it as "Stereo Howie" because when she used to wake up, dad would have the radio on in his bathroom, in his office, in my old room, in the kitchen, and in the living room. Every radio was set on 98.5 FM. Wherever he went, he could be listening - that is how mom came up with "Stereo Howie."

KU/St. Joseph's tonight on ESPN at 6 PM CST. This is a must win. So far we are 3-0 and beat every crappy mid major team with ease, yet we are 0-3 against all teams that are halfway decent.

Song of the Day: "It's Funky Enough" by The D.O.C.

Day 53

I have 10 cousins (I have three daughters, all of which......(inside joke)) . They are all great and unique people in their own right. Growing up I spent a ton of time with my cousins, something that most families don't do. Now that we are older, I see less of them because we are all spread out, but I have gotten a lot closer with some of them. I think we now see things differently than we did as kids.

This blog entry is dedicated to my cousin Julie, one of the coolest and most down to earth people I know. Her birthday was yesterday, and in typical TD fashion, I totally forgot! Jules is a lot like me in the sense that we are the younger and to some senses wilder siblings in our family. Over the past 6-7 years, essentially once Jules came into her own, we have become very close. She attended the University of Wisconsin and on her way to and from school, she always stayed with Leah and I. We have spent some high quality times together. Whether it be in Florida for Grandpops 90th or going to see the Greyboy Allstars at the House of Blues in Chicago, fun always seems to follow with us. One of my alltime favorite times that the family spent together was when we went out to Nighttown the Saturday night of thanksgiving to celebrate Julie's 21st b-day. The crew was in full effect. We had myself, Leah, Kathy, Steve, "Cousin" Brendan, Debbie, Steve J, Susie, Uncle Kenny, Aunt Linda, and a bunch of Julie's friends. Lets just say we closed the place down. I haven't seen our family having that much drunken fun in years. Uncle Kenny was in rare form downing Scotch's like it was his job. Fun was had by all. I always talk about trying to "recreate Julie's 21st" but it never seems to happen.

Jules has such a big heart. She is very independent. After she graduated from school, Julie went on a 40 day solo cross country trip that started in Cleveland and ended in San Francisco where she now lives. She made stops all over the country to party and visit friends. My friend Dave who has spent time with Julie has always told me how he doesn't know anyone else who could have pulled that trip off successfully the way she did. Both Julie and her sister Kathy are pretty amazing like that. They have both done their own things and have been successful in doing so. I couldn't be prouder of her. She is now working for the Timbuk 2 bag company in San Francisco and living in the big city. San Francisco is lucky to have her, and I am lucky enough to have her for my cousin. They don't come much cooler than Julie.

Song of the Day: "2 of America's Most Wanted" by 2Pac.

Day 52

So last night I was in Grand Rapids, MI and was eager to watch my young Jayhawks play Nevada at the Fieldhouse. I've said all year I was going to be patient with this young team. Well it is so frustrating to watch mistake after mistake on offense and watch guys commit dumb fouls. I won't bore you with the details, but we lost by 2 and had a chance to tie at the end, but couldn't get a shot off. It made me start to think about how impatient and fickle sports fans can be.

Being a Cleveland Sports fan my whole life, I know nothing but disappointment. I feel like I've seen every single possible way to lose in my 29 years on this earth. I've seen "The Drive" in person. I've seen "The Fumble." I've seen "The Shot" in person. I've witnessed Jose Mesa shaking off signs from Sandy Alomar only 2 outs away from a World Series title. I've seen my KU Jayhawks be a #1 seed three times and a #2 seed once in my 4 years of college, yet always find a way to choke before getting to the Final Four. I've seen my Jayhawks finally get to the promise land, only to shot 12-30 from the free throw line and lose by 3 to Syracuse. But I always go back for more. Some say I am a glutton for punishment. That is probably true.

I have seen a change in perceptions of sports fans in this technologically savvy day and age. Now everyone seems to have an opinion, whether it be callers venting to local and national sports talk radio hosts about the coach of their favorite team or anonymous "fans" going on chat boards on the internet to complain about their point guard's lack of heady play down the stretch of a game. The bottom line is this - winning cure all. This season when the Tribe was leading the league in one run losses, our manager Eric Wedge was being called out as an amateur by fans and newspaper columnists. But during our white hot streak in August and September, he could do no wrong and he was touted as a possible manager of the year candidate. This summer Bill Self was being lauded as a recruiting genius when he scored the late signing of Brandon Rush. Today, the chat boards are crazy with "Bill Self can't coach" posts as our record dropped to 2-3, worst start since 1972. As I said, winning cures all. I'll say this, Billy boy has until February to show me some growth with this young team before I start calling him out.

Song of the Day: "Work" by Gangstarr

Day 51

#51 is the number of one of my all time favorite Browns, Eddie "The Assassin" Johnson. One of the meanest, toughest linebackers in Browns history. Just loved him growing up. Unfortunately, Eddie's tie in to my family is that he too passed away in 2003 due to complications from cancer. I saw this quote when looking up to see when he died. It was Hanford Dixon talking about him: "E.J. was always such a fighter," said Dixon, who was drafted with Johnson in 1981. "At one point yesterday he took off his oxygen mask and left it off for over an hour as if to send us a message: I will not go down without a fight."

Woke up to snow this morning in Chicago. Just a dusting, but snow nonetheless. I was supposed to go to Grand Rapids in the morning, a 3 hour drive. We were going to leave at 5am, but the weather there is calling for 3 inches of snow overnight, so my co-worker and I are heading up there tonight instead. No point in trekking through the snow at 5am when I am half asleep. This is probably a better plan. Thanks goodness tomorrow is Friday. I am looking forward to the weekend. This week has seemed very long to me. The after the holiday week is always tougher. Seems like there is a lot of things to catch up on.

Its a strange thing about jobs, work, and pretty much everyone I know. Does anyone really love their job? My brother is a sportscaster and even he doesn't love what he is doing sometimes. I hated my last job. It was a joke of a company and I knew it. The last straw was when the essentially robbed me of about $5000. So I began to look around. I was lucky to hook up with a quality company like Prairie which treats its employees so well. But do I love the job? Not really. I look at my friends and the jobs they are in. Most of them do what they do for a paycheck and that is it. Do you think that Sheri is passionate about finding people jobs at her advertising agency or Sean loves being a broker at etrade financial? Not likely. I know another person living under this roof where I am typing this from who works extremely hard at her job yet gets zero satisfaction from it. It makes you wonder why we all do what we do. The answer is simple - Money. If you would have told me 10 years ago that I would be a sales manager selling plastic cups and foam plates, I would have told you that you were crazy.

Life works in strange ways. MD always wanted to be a play by play man for an NBA team. He knew it at age 6. How many people can say they are doing what they always dreamed of doing as a kid? Not many I know of. But he worked on this from high school on. He wrote a sports column for the newspaper. He went to college and as a freshman worked his way onto the most well known student radio station for sportscasting in the country. He became a basketball, football, and lacrosse play by play man and honed his skills at a young age. I could have done something like that. It would have been easy to go to the student station at KU and offer myself up to do some grunt work before getting my own show. I was too busy partying and not going to class to do so. Even my boy Sturch got his act together enough and he got his own show being "Roots Ryan" the reggae show dj on Saturday's from 4-6 for two years. I don't have many regrets in life, but that is definitely one of them, not taking the iniative to start early so I could eventually work in the sports field. I did intern one summer at the Kansas City Fox affiliate, which was great, but I never really pursued it any further. Oh well, what could have been.

Song of the Day: "Deacon Blues" by Steely Dan