Day 11

Returning to C-Town for weekends has obviously been forever changed with the passing of my father. I always look forward to coming home, but these visits are so bittersweet. While I love seeing my mom, visiting with my grandparents, aunts and uncles, a huge void remains inside of me here. I haven't lived here in 10 years, and things have definitely changed. The house I grew up in largely stays the same, which I love. I was lucky enough to grow up in one house that my mother still lives in. This house is so full of amazing memories. Basketball games with my brother in the basement, baseball games in the backyard, hoops and "grounders" in the driveway. Those memories never fade. Although, something still doesn't sit right with me when I walk into my old room which used to be covered in sports posters, pictures, and Sports Illustrated covers, and now its a blue guest room. At least my room is blue, MD's old room is pink - what happened to the Webster "Web-star" Slaughter poster and the shag carpeting?

But now, as I enter the house through the garage as I always do, opening the door and not seeing my father sitting in his robe and slippers, in his chair, remote in hand, sadness runs through me. I get over it very quickly, but I just feel like he is going to be there when I walk in. On visits, he always cleared his schedule for us. We always did a lunch at Sokolowski's or Champps, went down to the Jake for a game, went down to the Indians team store for a new Tribe t-shirt or something. He was always up to do whatever we wanted. As sad as it is, I know how lucky I am. I got 28 plus years on unbelievable memories and a relationship that most kids can never dream of having with a parent. But being in this house, as I sit typing this blog at his desk. is a constant reminder that he is no longer here.

That being said, we are having a nice visit with my mother here so far. It was great to break the fast at my cousin Debbie's last night. Its always a pleasure holding court with my cousins, aunts and uncles. I had the good material working last night as well.......... Is there anything better than good chopped liver? My stomach sure didn't seem to think so this morning at 6am. Between the 8 peanut butter cup cookies and the pound of chopped liver I consumed after fasting all day yesterday, its no wonder I was where I was this morning.......Casey absolutely loves the suburbs. She has been running all around my mother's house with all of this space to roam. She loves all the grass, running around the yard, going for long walks with us off leash. Its like when she comes to Cleveland she has died and gone to dog heaven. She is a city dog at heart, but I know she, like Leah, is ready for the suburbs.

Song Of The Day: "For No One" by The Beatles. Sort and sweet. "and in her eyes you see nothing. No sing of love behind the tears. Cried for no one, a love that should have lasted years."