Day 13

30. Seems like a nice enough number. So many of my friends are now turning the big 3-0. I'm getting closer and closer. Leah is less than 3 months away from the big day. Its so funny to think about what the number means to me now and what I thought it meant when I was 19 turning 20. I remember being 19, 20, 21 - thinking turning 30 was the end of my life. 30 is ancient to 19 year olds. I keep thinking that I could pass for a college student. I pride myself of the fact that when I need to I "skew younger." When my friends and I went back to Lawrence in February, we kept asking girls how old do they think we are (because college guys always ask girls that question at bars, right?). They would all say "26, 27." I guess I don't pass for a college kid.

When you are in your mid to late 20's, you begin to realize that between the ages of about 25-36, we are all the same- people in the real world rat race, trying to make our money and keep ourselves happy, with friends all over the board. I have two cousins below the age range and a buddy who is well over the age range who fall into our category of the people who can hang with anyone - so it is a sliding scale. I look at Ags as a prime example. He is one of my best friends. He is single, in his mid-30's, still loves going out, watching sports, and loves his family. I can bring Ags out with my friends in their mid-20's and he fits in perfectly, or I can go hang with Ags's crew in their mid-30's and fit in perfectly.

Turning 30 makes me feel old in one sense, but still young in another. My father was 33 and my mother was 29 when they had me. Of the Grandchildren on my dad's side, there are only three of 10 left in their 20's, Kath, Jules, and I - and I am not in that group much longer. That makes me feel young. On the other hand, next weekend I am attending my cousin's son's, bar mitzvah. That makes me feel old. A few months ago, I went to a bar in Lincoln park with my boys Johnson and Arnie, both who are at least 4 years younger than me. I knew within 5 minutes of being there that I was probably the oldest guy there. I used to go out in this area all of the time, and I left that night saying I wouldn't be making a return appearance. Never thought I would ever feel old at spots like that one. The point is that age is all how you view it. If you want to make yourself feel old, that is up to the beholder. I choose to try and be like my father - a mature, responsible, 30 year old, while at the same time being a young, energetic 30 year old who is looked at as a fun guy by people of all ages.

Song of the Day: "On My Block" by Scarface. I really don't like any hip hop track that came out post 1996-97, but this one has an old school feel to it. No lyric with quoting, just a great, easy background track.